Here is Chapter 12:
Chapter 12
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1 comment:
I like the descent into hell theme going on here though when I see the orchids and flower. I wonder if Dante may be nowhere to be found. In terms of the descent. I think it could be even more intriguing with some more conversation on the way down to the bowels of this building. Even if it is more nonchalant talk about daily life. Not all conversation has to be integral to moving the plot along, but the mundaneness of life makes things seem real to the reader. People chat about the latest TV show, th dirtiness of the elevator, how they hate working late, etc...Though I understand that your novel is really about something, not all your characters, nor all their conversations, need be consumed about these life/death issues in their lives.
Speaking of characters, we have this female doctor which is interesting since our female friends are leaving us fast and furiously. She is given brief treatment and I wonder as a reader how integral she may be to our story. You provided some description--and some connection with the two male doctors (or are they all scientists?)--and if she is to become a new figure in your plot line., perhaps some conversation between these two guys and her seems appropriate. Even if she is not, they all went t o the same school and/or their trip down to the negative 43rd floor seems rare, they should have some senseless banter to get through before they get down to business. SO, I guess my thought for the day is that real people in real life are pretty boring. And that is OK, because when the action and the resulting tension arises in your plot, it offers a contrast to the lives that we are all so familiar with. enjoy the weekend and sorry for your loss
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